I am curious about the occurrence of coincidences, and wonder what this phenomenon might be telling us, if anything at all.  Does the Universe give us ‘signs’, similar to directional traffic signs which tell us when to stop, go, proceed with caution, slow down, enter at your own risk, danger ahead and so on. If we recognize the ‘signs’, how should we respond? Most times these ‘signs’ just seem……well, meaningless and insignificant.

I had some (seemingly?) insignificant coincidences occur just this week.  Firstly, my sister in Australia texted me an image of tickets she had just purchased, to see a stand-up comedy show in Perth – the same show was already fully booked out in advance in Auckland. Within the hour, I received an unrelated call from a friend gifting two tickets to the same sold-out show in Auckland, because they could no longer attend!  What are the chances?  Coincidence? 

The following morning, another sister in South Africa, texted me a photograph she had taken of a tree, while idling in traffic that wasn’t moving.  She thought the tree looked like the shape of a dinosaur, T-Rex she said. I said I thought the tree looked more like T. Rump if I turned it sideways, but that was just my opinion.  That same evening I saw a segment on the news about the Chelsea Gardens in the UK, and their Jurrasic Park themed exhibition.  The background image on the screen was of a tree, shaped like a dinosaur!  The dinosaur comically had a pair of trousered human legs protruding from its mouth that looks suspiciously like T. Rump’s golf trousers to me.  Coincidence? Mmmm.

Rhonda Byrne, author of The Secret, said “There are no accidents or coincidences in life – everything is synchronicity – because everything has a frequency. It’s simply the physics of life and the universe in action.” If there is no such thing as a coincidence, what is this thing we call ‘coincidence’?

A coincidence can be described as the occurrence of unplanned or unexpected events that seem to have some connection or meaning. For example, if you bump into an old friend at the supermarket who you haven’t seen for 30 years, that is a coincidence. If you both happen to be dressed in the same clothes and shoes in the same colour, that is an even more remarkable coincidence.

The word coincidence comes from the Latin word coincidere, which means to agree, to coincide, however, not all coincidences are agreeable and can sometimes be tragic, ironic, or even sinister. For instance, if you witness a car accident and later find out that the victim was someone you knew; that is a tragic coincidence.  Or if you have been buying a lottery ticket each week, year in-year out, always using the exact same numbers, and one week you fail to buy your ticket only to discover this was the exact week your numbers came in; that is an ironic coincidence. Or imagine a work colleague receives a shocking call that their home has just been burgled resulting in them having to leave work immediately, then you leave work later that day and are shocked to discover that your car has been stolen; that is a sinister coincidence.

Coincidence or Synchronicity?

Coincidences can be classified into different types according to their nature and frequency. One type is synchronicity, which is a meaningful coincidence that seems to reveal a hidden order or purpose in the universe.

Synchronicity is a phenomenon first introduced by the Swiss psychologist Carl Jung, who believed that synchronicity was a manifestation of the collective unconscious – a deeper layer of the human psyche that transcends the individual ego and connects us with a higher reality.

“Synchronicity is an ever-present reality for those who have eyes to see.”

― Carl Jung

According to Jung, synchronicity occurs when an inner event (such as a thought, a dream, or an intuition) coincides with an outer event (such as a meeting, a phone call, a text, a conversation) in a way that is meaningful and relevant for the person experiencing it. For example, if you think of someone and then they call you, or if you dream of a person and then bump into them by chance the next day, that is synchronicity.

Jung argued that synchronicity is not a result of chance or coincidence, but rather a reflection of a hidden order or pattern in the universe. He also suggested that synchronicity can be seen as a form of guidance or communication from the collective unconscious, which can help us understand ourselves and our destiny.

Coincidence or Serendipity?

Another type of coincidence is a fortunate one that leads to a positive outcome or discovery, and is referred to as ‘serendipity’.  

The word serendipity was coined by the author Horace Walpole in 1754, and is based on an ancient Persian fairy tale called ‘The Three Princes of Serendip’.

“Serendipity is the faculty of making fortunate discoveries by accident.”

― Horace Walpole

Serendipity is a phenomenon that describes the occurrence of finding valuable or delightful things by chance or making discoveries by accident, without looking for them or expecting them. For example, your grandfather lost a rare book many years ago and you stumble upon the exact book in a flea market, or you find a valuable piece of jewellery in a thrift store that is a replica of the one in the photograph you have of your great-great grandmother, or if you meet your soulmate on a random trip, these things are all serendipitous.

The phenomena of coincidence, synchronicity and serendipity holds a fascination for those who see these patterns as signs of divine intervention, fate, destiny, or karma; believing that a deeper meaning and purpose is being revealed about themselves, others or the future. Some see them as natural phenomena that can be explained by science, psychology, or statistics, while others may view these events as random chance or probability – insignificant and irrelevant in the big scheme of things, with no inherent meaning or value, believing that it is only our perception or interpretation of the occurrence that gives it meaning.

“Coincidences give you opportunities to look more deeply into your existence.”

― Doug Dillon

Finding Meaning in Coincidences

Coincidence, synchronicity and serendipity can enrich our lives and reveal hidden patterns and meanings in the universe. They can also challenge our assumptions and expectations about reality and inter-connectedness. In today’s world of continuous distractions, we may miss or ignore these phenomena, or dismiss them as irrelevant or insignificant.  On the flipside, we may also become too attached to them, or seek them out as a way of escaping from our problems or responsibilities.

Should we take notice, what do these subtle patterns tell us and how should we respond?

Do:

• Learn to balance coincidence, synchronicity and serendipity with reason, logic and evidence.
• Learn to use them as tools for inspiration, guidance and creativity, not as excuses for ignorance, denial or laziness.
• Learn to recognize the difference between meaningful and meaningless coincidences, between genuine and false synchronicities, between beneficial and harmful serendipities.
• Learn to appreciate the mystery and beauty of coincidence, synchronicity and serendipity, but also the reality and responsibility of free will and action.

Don’t:

• Don’t let coincidence, synchronicity and serendipity become your masters or your crutches.
• Don’t let them dictate your actions or decisions, or make you dependent on them.
• Don’t let them distract you from your goals or values, or make you complacent or arrogant.
• Don’t let them blind you to the risks or consequences of your choices, or make you irresponsible or reckless.

Be mindful, be curious, and be grateful.

• Be mindful of the present moment, and pay attention to what is happening around you and within you.
• Be curious about the events and people that cross your path, and explore their connections and implications.
• Be grateful for the opportunities and discoveries that arise from coincidence, synchronicity and serendipity, and acknowledge their source and purpose.

Lastly, what did I learn about the connection between dinosaur shaped trees and tickets to a stand-up comedy show? 

I learned that these two unrelated silly stories of personal interactions with two of my sisters, have something significant in common. My sisters and I are separated by oceans and continents (and have been for the past 25 years), and yet we remain cosmically connected through our similar sense of humour and our familial bonds and ties.  Our similar worldviews allow us to share laughs and giggles together in spite of the physical distances between us all.  And that is what makes these seemingly insignificant coincidences, deeply meaningful and inter-connected for me.

© Gaynor Clarke, May 2023